The other night, my not-quite-three-year old daughter walked straight up to another table in a restaurant and said to a little girl eating with her family “Are you wearing tights?” Except for the fact that she was, indeed, wearing tights, the question was totally out of the blue.

Neither of the girls thought this was a strange way to start what turned into a little conversation about their clothes, and I had a quick exchange with the father about how charming and friendly our girls are. 

While there is nothing at all wrong with her approach – in fact, I love her straightforward friendliness – I have a feeling it will change as she learns the finer points of social interaction. But I have to say, I can relate to her more than she knows.

As I navigate my way through social media, I feel like I’m learning the unwritten rules of interacting with people all over again. Should I re-tweet something, and if I do, what’s the right way to acknowledge the original “tweeter?” Should I direct message someone who complimented me on Twitter, or is it better to Tweet my “Thanks!”?  If someone follows me, how obligated am I to follow back?

There’s a teeny, tiny portion of the population out there that knows the rules inside and out. They’re the one’s responsible for molding them. But if you’re a little unsure, trust me, you’re not alone. 

Take this guy, a PR bigwig who insulted his client, FedEx, on Twitter. Interestingly, he hurled the insult from the airport on his way to present to them about digital media in corporate communications. This guy is one of the so-called experts.

Turns out, the advice I give my daughter, myself, and those of you testing the social media waters are the same: be nice, get in there and make friends, and help those who know even less than you do. After all, everyone who is good at anything was once a beginner.

One of the basic rules of public relations is that timing is everything. Just ask the notorious Jo Moore, who distributed a memo to co-workers on the afternoon of September 11, 2001 telling them that it was now “a very good day to get out anything we want to bury.” 

Ever so slightly less obvious was the Heartland Payment Systems news about the largest security breach in history, announced during President Obama’s inauguration. Or John Edwards’ adultery confession on a Friday during the Olympics.

But good timing goes both ways. Just as you can bury bad news by announcing it when the world is looking the other way, you can also use good timing to increase your odds of soaking up the spotlight when you have a story to tell.

You increase your chances of getting the media’s attention if you can tie your story to a larger trend or legislation that is getting a lot of attention, by understanding reporters’ deadlines and contacting them at just the right time, or just by paying attention to the calendar.

Tuesday is my favorite day of the week for sending news releases or story pitches. 

Here’s why:

Monday – too much competition. Everyone is clamoring for attention on the first morning after the weekend, and it’s easy to get lost in the shuffle.

Tuesday – not as much competition, and still plenty of time for a story to run before Friday.

Wednesday – my second-favorite day for sending news, but if you’re targeting print media you can be cutting it close for getting your news seen that week.

Thursday – Thursday in and of itself isn’t bad, but chances are your news will run on Friday or Saturday, when fewer people are likely to see it.

Friday – too late. Remember John Edwards? Friday is a better day for buying news than showing it off.

Any PR person worth his or her salt will tell you that the number one rule for media pitching is to read the media outlet – and even better, the journalist – before you ever pick up the phone or tap out an email.

I am FaceBook friends with freelance writers, I follow editors and reporters from places like the New York Times and NBC News on Twitter, and of course I read several blogs per day. But working with mainstream media still constitutes a very large share of the work we do, and I still read a lot of media the old fashioned way – in print, after the mailman or newspaper delivery person drops it off.

I work from a home office, and my mail carrier has to wonder what in the heck goes on in here.  Here’s a sampling of the magazines he has delivered to my door over the past few days: Washington Technology, Information Week, Franchise Times, Water Utility Management, CRN, Working Mother and Equipment World.

I view online versions when I can, but sometimes the best way to get a feel for a magazine, a section or a columnist is still to pick it up a couple of months in a row, flip through the pages, hold it in your hands and read it. 

Want extra brownie points with a client? Pick up the scissors, cut out an article they’d find interesting, and drop it in the mail with a stamp and a handwritten note. Or, better yet, bring it to your next client meeting and hand it over in person. It’s old fashioned, I know. But it works.

This week, it seems like everywhere I turn someone is talking about doing work for trade. I’ve either had or heard conversations about this topic at least once each day for the past several days. I chalk it up to the economy.

I tend to stand pretty firmly in the don’t-do-it camp, but I’ll admit I’ve dabbled a couple of times. In both cases, I’m somehow still the debtor. One of them I’m eager to repay, but my creditor isn’t sure how best to use his handful of free hours of PR services. The other I feel I repaid ages ago, but she seems to keep asking for more.

Even though I’m 0-2, I think it can work in a few cases:

- Both of your needs are immediate. You need a wedding photographer; a wedding photographer needs someone to design his brochure. Perfect. Both projects have a clear “end,” and both need to be done now. When the wedding is over and the brochure is printed, you’re even-Steven.

- The deliverables are clearly defined. Grey area is dangerous territory, and where I got tripped up. Make sure you both know what you’re getting before you get started.

- When you both get something you would pay for anyway. This is key. What good is a month of free acupuncture when you can’t put food on the table? Or you’re afraid of needles? If it’s going to work, you have to be swapping for something you’d pay for anyway.

- When you’re trading with a good friend. And I mean really good, like the kind of friend you’d give a kidney to. If you would design your friend’s logo as a favor, but she offers to give you free salsa lessons to even the score, that just makes it more fun. But really, it’s a favor.

And outside of that, I’m tempted to say steer clear.

Anyone else remember the Pizza Hut Book It! program? This has been one of my all-time favorite marketing campaigns pretty much since age 5. It was designed to encourage elementary-age children to read. When reading goals were met, we would receive a coupon for a free personal pan pizza.

The BookIt! program was heaven for kids like me. I read because I loved it, and couldn’t believe I would actually be rewarded with pizza. These days, it would be like someone offering to reward me for sleeping with cash.

When my sister and I came home from school with our pizza certificates in our hot little hands, it meant it was time for a trip to town. We’d pile in the car and head to the nearest Hut, with the two of us ordering our personal pan pepperonis, my parents ordering a large and the four of us splitting a pitcher of pop. The order, the restaurant, the jukebox, the Ms. Pacman – there was never the slightest variation in this beloved routine.

Talk about marketing genius. Every kid in our class and those in all of the schools around ours would bury our noses in our books, and then drag our parents to Pizza Hut. The place was always packed with kids ordering their personal pans. I hardly remember eating anywhere else when I was little, and I loved it.

And here’s the really good news: turns out, Book It! has survived all of these years and they’re currently enrolling classes and kids for the 2009 program. Who knew? 

I’m surprised we’re not hearing more about Heartland Payment Systems and what’s shaping up to be the largest data security breach in U.S. history. It seems as though hackers had access to one of the largest credit card payment processing company’s customer data for “several weeks” toward the end of the year. Some quick math indicates that upward of 100 million credit card accounts have been compromised.

So far, details about what happened have been sketchy and slow to seep out. And what makes it even more interesting from a PR perspective is that the company announced the security breach on January 20, right, smack in the middle of President Obama’s inauguration festivities. On purpose? You betcha.

On one hand, I feel like the decision to step across the threshold into the blogosphere requires an explanation. As though I should offer up some kind of rhyme or reason for entering the fray.

On the other hand, what’s to explain? Social media is the way of the present. You know, the whole lead, follow, get out of the way thing. I’m definitely following the gazillion bloggers who came before me, and even so, I’m still leading many who are still uninitiated. But I don’t want to get out of the way, so here I am.

Allow me to set the stage. This blog is for business purposes. Although I’m still not sure anyone cares all that much about my random thoughts about what’s going on in the world, I do have some helpful insight into PR. After 15 years in the biz, I’ve learned a few lessons. I’ll dole out the worthwhile ones here.

First and foremost, I’m a wife and mom. So even though this isn’t my personal blog, if you stick with me you’re sure to get a hearty glimpse into this juggling act of a life that includes running a business, a couple of kids, an entrepreneur husband, enjoying all that our Colorado lifestyle has to offer, and as much travel as we can squeeze in the cracks.

For now, welcome.